Tag: coffee

Have we talked about the little things?

~ NewBeginnings ~ Leave a comment

Whoop! its a double whammy weekend! You all are blessed with back-to-back posts! Who even am I right now!? lol

Idk what it is, maybe Mercury heading into the microwave again!? But by 8:20am PST on a Sunday, I was reminded how important the little things are.

From driving to Hermosa for breakfast then getting my Bees Knees from HiFi – every small moment hit me, in not all the good ways, lol. I mean, the realizations aren’t bad.. for example – as I am driving, I am thinking about finding new local spots in TX.. and then having a moment of, well, when I moved to SoCal, I felt the same way. I only “like” these places bc they are somewhat comfortable. And I say somewhat, bc it’s more the people – and a person forgot to tell me schedules had changed. So I drove for no reason if you will, bc I can get a better experience 3min from my current apartment.

Now I will say that, this normally wouldn’t bother me as much as it did bc whatever, stuff happens all the time. But I think in this moment it was just reminding me that people matter, not necessarily the places. Bc then I head back towards home, and stop by my local coffee shop since caffeine is needed on this packing day.. and I realize who’s working. And to clarify, these people aren’t terrible, lol, but I am in need of a certain experience today especially after having a misstep already this morning. So when I didn’t see “my people” I walked out and went across the street to a cafe where I know no one. And as simple as this situation may seem, it made a difference. My coffee is bomb, and it actually put a smile on my face bc the latte art is always on point there too. And then I started thinking.. why am I trying so hard to accept the mediocre? Why am I trying to do things a certain way, or only go to certain places bc I’m leaving? These people don’t care! lol I mean, ok there’s prob a small moment of awww – you were a great local, but other than that, these people be living their lives without me.

All together, as I got back in my car and headed “home” I just felt like I had to remind myself: This chapter is closing, stop trying to hold on to things that essentially, don’t matter. Bc just like this morning experience, I have dealt with these let downs so many times, but I felt they were just small inconveniences. When now looking at the big picture, they should have been signs of how inadequate living in the SoBay has actually been for me, especially the last couple of years. No wonder I’ve felt lonely. No wonder I never felt like a part of something. I was holding on to the big moments and orchestrated nights out. Holding on to when people came to visit and I could show them the “good parts”.

I have no regrets on how long I stayed here, the last year alone allowed me to meet one of my favorite people, and honestly, depending on what you believe in, I coulda met them anyway in some other way! lol. But these small things are hitting me more now. It’s like when you are finally in a good place after a bad breakup and you see things so clearly now, and wonder how you missed all the red flags. All those little things.

Brings me back to that conversation with my best friend – Its about the Wednesday nights. The small, “insignificant”, moments, that you think don’t matter.. they matter so much more than we realize.

And maybe I was so inclined to write this today (more like vent, to be honest, lol) on a whim, bc you know how much I love to remind y’all about these things! And like most epiphanies, I can’t be the only one with open eyes having these moments, and looking for reassurance. So if this helps any of you see things a little differently, or helps with a decision, or just a reminder to never go a day with bad coffee ever again, lol, then my job is done ❤

cheers, xoxo

manhunt.

~ NewBeginnings ~ 4 Comments

I’m about 3-4 months away from making it a whole year without sex.

TMI? Sorry.. wait no, I’m not sorry. Because theres nothing wrong with saying it. I am not ashamed of it, and I’m sure there are a few people sitting in this boat I’m floating in.. I am also sure that some of you who are reading this are shocked. Way to think I’m a floozy! HA! Honestly, I’m partially shocked too. Anyway.. with the many conversations I have had with friends from back east, my roommate, and even my cousins, I’ve realized it’s not because I haven’t had any chances, its just that I’ve become a monster. In a good way. I think.

I am still as boy-crazy as ever, but I have created un-attainable standards for any male who thinks they are getting past a hand shake with me.

Good? Maybe. Bad? Probably. Because, yes, I am looking for more than a romp in the sack, but at the same time, I’m not giving any chances. And for someone who has made plenty bad decisions in her day when it comes to men.. HAHAHA – literally laughing at myself right now – It’s a strange feeling to have.. what are those called? Oh right, standards.

I partially blame it on my ex. After 5 years, it sadly didn’t work, but that’s not to say it was because of him. Oh, I take full responsibility. I wanted different things, and I lost my spark. But looking back, and now looking forward.. these future guys have ALOT to live up to. I mean, my ex had an amazingly stable and well-paying job, he had a great family, was relatively responsible, and took care of me like no one ever had. He knew how to fix things, make things.. he even changed the brakes on my car.. and they are still working! 😉 He knew how to cook, and he was my best friend. Being on my own now for almost 7 months, I can see the little things on why it didn’t work, but that doesn’t take away his awesomeness.

So now when I meet those of the male species, I’m all like – “What do you do for a living? Do you like sports? Do you know anything about cars? Are you reliable? Can you drive a manual?.” And the list goes on.. I mean, if the poor guy doesn’t have nice shoes on I’m judging! Even though my ex was a home-town boy who loved fishing and Star Wars, he did know a good shoe. And there it is. Damn him! Why did he have to be almost perfect?!

Of course I know the answer.. so I don’t settle for less than perfection. Which makes my love for Bradley Cooper all the more reasonable. But here comes a new problem. Every guy I find who meets these standards of mine are One of Three things:

Taken – Married with children – or Gay.

What am I supposed to do with that?! And all the others..? I’ve been throwing down the friend-card left and right. Because, I’m sorry, if you are a man, you don’t have to necessarily drive a manual, but you at least have to know how. Especially if I drive one. And yes, that means something to me. It’s almost as is important as how I take my coffee.

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So call me crazy, call me bitchy, call me unrealistic, or even unreasonable.. But there are things in life we hold to non-negotiables. And for me, I have a lot of them. But even with non-negotiables, in the end it does come down to emotion and spark. I know that sounds absolutely insane after everything I have just said, but I am a hopeless romantic deep down. I’m an Aquarian for goodness sakes, I believe in the stars and the dreams that hold them.. It has been said about Aquarians that, “Although you appear aloof and detached you’re inwardly sensitive and caring.” See? I’m just bitchy, crazy, and judgmental on the outside! 😉

But seriously though, it is a cycle.. common interests create a conversation, which creates common ground, which in turn creates a friendship.. it’s the spark that creates the relationship. And like Rich said, worst case, if I’m gonna become a hussy, I might as well have standards.

Oh well.. Charlotte did quote that you can become re-virginized after a year of no sex. Thank you Sex & the City for once again making me feel better about my life.. gah!

Cheers!

tall, raspberry iced coffee, in a grande cup.. with extra ice.

~ NewBeginnings ~ 2 Comments

I currently have three fave hotspots where I constantly spend my time: Barnes & Noble and two different Starbucks. The Barnes & Noble is lovely on days off, especially rainy days and snowy days. Its quiet, has a lovely view of the highway, several things for me to read, and a cafe. My two Starbucksss (how DO you make Starbucks plural?) are similar for obvious reasons, but the main difference between the two, is which way and what time am I going to work?

I will keep these two Starbucksss fairly indistinguishable because continuing on this post, I don’t want to give anything away of which location I am talking about. Now, it’s not that I like one better than the other, they both have their defining qualities.. Like, one has a rude manager who I’ve seen get into arguments with customers and creates fear in me. At one of them, almost the entire staff knows my order way too well it almost scares me. (Or maybe thats both..) One has an awesome older gentleman who wears THE BEST hats. One of his hats is like those beer helmets with the straws, except it has coffee cups! (and OMG he is wearing it today!!) One of the Starbucksss has amazing seating. By amazing, I mean no matter where you sit, you are close enough to an outlet (this is important because somedays I sit for almost 8 hours. Hey, I job hunt too!) One also name-drops me.. bad. You heard me! Name-Drops! I can go on about their differences, but one thing is for sure, they both have internet, coffee, and baristas (or baristOs, as Danielle likes to call them, because they are guys) who are fairly talked about amongst my friends.

These baristOs we talk about are more important than the coffee or internet, obvi. There are the cute baristOs and the baristas (yah all kinds) who you know make your coffee better than others. Is it bad that when I send a girl out to get my coffee, and they come back with something questionable, I always ask who was working? There is some validity in  knowing who is making the coffee. (A perfect example is when I order a certain drink and ask for it ‘skinny’. There is a sign in (I assume) every the Starbucksss that states: Try it ‘skinny’ = skim milk + sugar-free (or unsweetened). So when I order a ‘skinny’ beverage, why are they asking ME what that means?!  Mind you, this happens only at one of the two Starbucksss, but seriously?!) There is also the quintessential baristO-crush where you think they are flirting with you. I mean.. this happens ALL the time! RIGHT?! (BAHAHAHA I’m literally laughing out loud typing this)

And then there is the name-dropping.. Ok, I know.. if you go to any  Starbucks, you will know that 90% of the time, they will ask your name for the cup when they prep. But one Starbucks in particular name-drops like whoa! I mean, it makes me feel at home, and like they remember me, or at least something about me.. I guess thats the point.  But, a couple of baristOs at one of my Starbucksss totally made fun of my drink in front of me. They realize the drink bar is open to the public right? And what is so wrong with a tall iced-coffee-in-a-grande-cup-with-extra-ice?! Where I work, our air circulation is so terrible that it’s always about 75-80 degrees everyday.. do I really need to explain that to these baristOs?! And to top it all off, they know my name! Great.

Well this name-dropping business got me all confused. At one (or both 😉 ) of my Starbucksss I started getting name-dropped so often, I thought.. OMG do I  have a baristO-crush?! I mean, for the past few weeks, I’ve had my name said.. nicely.. and with a coffee behind it! And it’s not only when my coffee is ready, it’s been right when I walk in! “Kara, you’re not normally here this late are you?” “I’m not used to you NOT ordering a coffee, Kara.” Whoa I tell you. And ok, I get that someone of my nature, (who should probably just work for Starbucks at this point) who is in as frequently as I am, name-dropping should be a norm. Whatever, I’ll see it as flattery any day.

Which brings me to my point of this awesome post. The other day, I overheard one of my baristO-crush-name-droppers say something about a girl he was ‘seeing’. WHAT?! I mean, I myself, have had a boyfriend.. for 5yrs now. 🙂 But in moments like these, you don’t want to know those personal snip-its! Its like going to watch “Magic Mike’ and being reminded that Mr. Channing Tatum is MARRIED.. happily at that! You don’t want to think about that! You just want to watch him dance around and forget there is even a plot to the movie.. wait, is there?!

Question now is.. is he playing hard to get?! HAHAHAHA no.. but is it bad that now all this fake ‘special’ treatment is now normal? Knowing that any of these baristOs really don’t have crushes on me!? Wait, are Starbucks employees paid to flirt!? Maybe. Or maybe as a girl, it was just the flattery in it all.. and knowing that somewhere, the idea of someone having a crush on you, made you feel like.. a girl.  A girl in a movie. Co-staring with Channing Tatum. 😉

So to all you baristOs out there.. if you are even pretend-fliritng, don’t talk about other girls.. it’s unprofessional anyway to the public, and all us coffee-loving ladies want to pretend you have a crush on us. the end.