Untitled.

Whoa.

It’s been just about a month since my last post, and once again, I have a few drafts waiting to be finished.. Until those are completed, I would like to take a second to apologize for boring all you readers with nothing new! This new life in SoCal, has provided me with a job, which from my understanding was a feat in itself being able to secure something in one month. I guess I’ll give myself a pat on the back for that. With this new job, I have clearly been busy.. and then I blinked and it was Christmas. I literally began working the day before Thanksgiving which explains my month-long hiatus.

Not sure if you are aware, but many things can happen in a month. Many things can happen in a day.. an hour even.. seconds. And this past month not only have I experienced many things personally, I have also experienced things globally. There were good and of course there were some bad.. There were more heavy rains and cyclone/tsunami-type weather in the Philippines, more cold weather and snow in the Northeast, Pacquiao lost his fight, there were more birthday parties to attend, and of course, there was the wild hustle and bustle of Black Friday kicking off the holiday shopping season.. there was also my cousin, who finally landed a job herself after being out of work for over a year, and more recently, there was a heartbreaking tragedy in CT.

I don’t want to write about tragedies, or bring back terrible memories. I also don’t want you thinking that it hadn’t affected me. I want to explain that aside from the reality-check CT has brought me, everything else that has happened has reminded me of how absolutely blessed I am. I have my family, my friends, a job, and even a new roommate! I’ve had low moments questioning some of my decisions.. but all in all, I have another day. I can’t say that I’m plain lucky, because there have definitely been some questionable moments in my life. But to still be standing here experiencing yet another moment, even one as small as writing this blog post.. it allows me to remind all of you of how equally blessed you are to be able to read this.

I have always been a very grateful person, but more so recently the minute I moved across the country. I have thanked God everyday for what I have. I am thankful for every struggle and every happy moment. It was not easy re-starting my life. As crazy-positive of a person I am by nature, at times, I felt very defeated being here. I have phone calls and texts to prove it. But in all that is down, there is up, even if it seems impossible. For this Holiday season, I have God, but to whomever you have to thank, Thank them. Even If you are not spiritual, you have your best friend, or even your mother. Be thankful. Be kind. Stop waiting for reminders.

“It always amazes me how seemingly insignificant choices in life end up being all the more significant in time. I’m constantly reminded that all situations, opportunities, and relationships are precarious. It takes only seconds to change a life.” -Brian Sicard

best form of birth control..

..is other people’s children. Until you start to love them..

I knew the number one reason I wanted to move back to CA was because of family. The second reason was to follow dreams I hadn’t dreamt yet. With those dreams, I also thought I would be living the life of a socialite, a role that very much suited me in the North East.. and a role that thrives out here in the South West. However, the most social thing I have done recently is help my cousin take my niece and three of her friends to an amusement park for her 8th birthday.. with also trucking around my 16mo old nephew. Never mind the days where I’m helping watch my nephew and my other niece (who is 1yrs old).. which proves to be the greatest arm/shoulder/pectoral work out ever, but having to humor 4 third graders.. man, I forgot how exciting life as an 8yr old was. Or maybe it was more overwhelming then exciting.

Either way, I have only been in CA for 6 weeks (but it honestly feels like I’ve been here for years) so it doesn’t surprise me that I havent been able to live up to my socialite status yet. Focusing on finding a job was very life-consuming leaving me no time, or money, for friends. Also considering my perfect timing in moving.. right before the holidays.. I’ve been non-stop with family events and Thanksgiving. And of course, a month from today is Christmas. So really, my social status probably wont blossom until the new year.. which is my next challenge all in itself.

What DID surprise me though was the capability and patience (which is EXTREMELY difficult for me) I had to help take care of my nieces and nephews. Helping with homework, putting the babies down for naps, feeding, constant playing and distracting.. crazy I tell you. And more so, exhausting. I mean, I’ve never been terrible with kids, I just have absolutely no patience with them. So being able to manage screaming children and even getting them to stop? Well now, that’s a feat no one thought I would ever be able to accomplish, never mind enjoy. Theres the kicker.. I actually enjoy it. I love these kids. As crazy and wild, headache causing, and coffee requiring as they make me, Its like I’m helping nurture the future. I love the looks on their faces when they see me walk into the room. I know. I can’t believe I wrote those sentences too. And being with these crazy children makes me miss my brother and his four little ones even more. I’m starting to feel bad that I’m not able to be with them as much as I am with my cousins kids.

Now, don’t get all excited you people who know me.. I love these kids, but by no means will I start having ‘baby fever’. It is a strange emotional experience though.. that although the thought of me ever having my own children still makes me cringe, I now contemplate if I will ever have any. And Kelly, I don’t want to hear any ‘I told you so’ yet! Theres a still a long way for me to go before children ever become the forefront of my mind. For starters, there’s that socialite life I need to live first 😉 and of course, finding that someone who is worthy of me and my craziness.. in order to even make a baby.. which is far beyond important to me right now.

It’s just crazy that in 6 weeks, I fell in love with three kids. I make baby noises, I talk about Diary of a Wimpy Kid books, and I’m already planning a Christmas-movie-watching night with my cousin and my niece. I am THE auntie. I’m involved and helpful, and I’m able to give the children back! 😉 Hahaha! But honestly, that’s one thing that I am happy about though, because I always wanted to be THE auntie. We had that auntie growing up.. she wasn’t able to have children, so she raised us and treated us like her own. She was our biggest supporter, our biggest fan, and our biggest motivator. She prayed for us, took care of us, and even with me, being miles away.. she looked after us. When she passed away 3 years ago, it was the hardest thing my cousins and I ever had to deal with. It’s still hard sometimes, and like many things, we miss her most during the holidays. Maybe that’s why being THE auntie means so much to me. Because she may not have had her own, but she still had 6 children. And just like I tell my cousin every time we joke about me having kids.. I don’t need any.. because I already have 7.. which is such a perfect number. ❤